Frozen Paleo Pineapple Colada
I debated whether to include “ice cream replacement” in the name, since that’s what this is for us, but “pineapple colada” just rolls off the tongue a little better.
Also could have named it “5 Minute, 5 Ingredient Tropical Escape.” But it almost sounded risque.
Also tried to make it work as “Oops-I-Forgot-to-Make-a-Dessert-for-the-Guests,” because that’s how this delightful indulgence became part of our routine… but again - a little clunky.
Names aside…this is a little trick I’ve had up my sleeve for a while. It’s my dinner party go-to. I whipped it up as an after-dinner after-thought, and it’s ended up stealing the late evening show again and again.
It’s creamy, it’s dreamy. Its taste is unique yet subtly familiar.
And believe it or not…
It’s so healthy, you won’t believe it’s not as bad for you as ice cream. Or a frozen pina colada.
Plus, it’s pretty easy. Just dump & blend.
My Kind of Dessert
Heavy-gluteny-sugary-heat-the-house-with-blazing-oven kind of foods are just NOT what I crave in the summer. And eating liquid sugar and heavy cream is just not as appealing as it was when cartoons and candy were my main objectives in life. (Still appealing. But not as appealing.)
But sweet, refreshing, satisfying? That’s more like it. Preserving that (semblance of a) bikini bod, instead of bloating it up? Yes and amen. Bless-your-cells-superfood that tastes amazing? I’ll take all of the above. And such a combination IS possible on this side of heaven.
Believe and receive, my friends.
Click here to skip to the recipe pics. For best prices and answers to FAQs, keep reading.
A Versatile, No-Brainer Dessert
This is delicious all the time. All year round. No matter time of day, or what your main course was.
But I crave it hard after Asian food like Thai curry, or Thai Basil Beef & Lemongrass Rice Bowls, or maybe Vietnamese Bun or Pho with spring rolls. It also goes great with a margarita and summery Fresh Mex food like Fish Tacos. It fits the Asian dessert bill, the post-Mexican food bill, or the simply “I’m in the mood for a tropical cocktail” bill too… for pretty cheap.
Costco = My Cheat Code for Paleo Staples
It’s especially cost-effective if you’ve got a Costco membership. (And no, I’m not sponsored by them. But I am in love.)
This frozen organic pineapple I keep on hand for this recipe, and for my go-to detoxing Green Goddess Smoothie, my Tropical Smoothie Breakfast Bowl, or even my Pineapple Pico de Gallo if I don’t feel like cutting up a spiky fresh pineapple.
And, unlike the golden, dinosaur-like whole fruit - I ALWAYS have some on hand, since it ain’t going bad in the freezer!
At my Costco, it’s only $9.79 for 4lbs of organic frozen goodness ($2.45/lb) …that’s non-organic Walmart competition right there. Costco sometimes has organic limes for a SUPER low price too.
My Costco also sells a pack of 6 cans of real, organic coconut milk (only get the full-fat kind like this!!) for $9.99. At just $1.67 a can, that’s pretty darn affordable, ESPECIALLY for organic and no fillers!! The only other place you’ll find it that low is at Asian markets.
I use it often for coffee creamer recipes, Thai curry dishes, other desserts, and a replacement for heavy cream.
Regular grocery stores around here sell coconut milk cans for like $2.25 (and up to $3 if you want organic!!! WHAT!) For this clean-eating pantry staple, that’s just too pricy for me. So Costco it is!
Some stevia has a weird aftertaste. I like Better Stevia, since it’s pretty neutral and doesn’t give me headaches like some powders do that have fillers. Get it online or Sprouts/Natural Grocers for the best $$$.
Dump & Blend
I serve it immediately. Don’t even need to wait for it freeze to set up (but you can, if you want it less milk-shakey. I would only do it for about an hour though…otherwise it may freeze it solid.)
Just dump it all in the blender. Pour into 4 fancy-ish glasses, and top with more pineapple, mango, or coconut flakes to keep it tropical.
Or you could top it with fresh or frozen strawberries or blueberries. Even peaches would be delish!
To make it a true cocktail, add a few splashes of rum and a little more stevia or agave, and you’ve got a party!
Secret’s in the…oil!
Ok. So the magical easy-button-flavor here is NOT in the lime juice. It’s in the lime oil. If you’re a foodie, you know that lime zest or lemon zest is what’s packing the flavor punch in that lemon meringue pie or citrusy cocktail. Click here or the picture below for a TON of ways I use this delicious oil!
A Note on Buying Limes
Be SURE your limes are organic, especially when zesting or smashing the peel as you juice them. Regular citrus fruits have carcinogenic pesticides on the peels to protect them from insects - often, more than a child should be exposed to in one day!
So if you don’t wanna zest a bunch of limes, let me know if you want a bottle of real-deal, beyond organic lime essential oil. It’s approved for ingestion by the FDA. This little bottle has 100 drops (the zest of 150 limes) and is just $7.50 retail, and never goes bad or shrivels like retired limes do.
(Remember- most suppliers that claim their oils are “100% organic and pure” are full of it. Full of waxes, fillers, and pesticides that is. Learn more here on why I ONLY ingest Young Living essential oils.)
Substitution for Lime Oil?
PLEASE NOTE: you can’t just add more lime juice to this or any of my other recipes to substitute the Lime Oil…it will be really sour and liquidy, and … bland.
You gotta have the flavor from the colored part of the RIND. It’s the oil in those tiny little dimples on the peel that tastes and smells so zesty. Zest is the (almost as good) substitute. So use either:
2 drops of oil per serving or
The zest of 3 *gotta be organic-see above* limes per serving.
That’s 12 extra limes. Lotta zesting/wrist cramps. Up to you.
And now…on to the show!!
Again- top with mango/pineapple/coconut flakes, or strawberries/blueberries/peaches.
For a true cocktail, add a few splashes of rum and a little more stevia or agave!
Click through the slideshow to see how it’s made. Bon Apetit!